Some days I just wake up completely exhausted and feeling low. Finding no motivation to get out of bed and I’m even dreading the fact I have to do things. It even triggers me. Yet, I have so many things I “need” to do and what I feel others expect me to do.
Yesterday was an odd day. I woke up having a borderline existential crisis again and I barely wanted to do anything. You know the days where you just want to lay in bed and watch Netflix all day. But nooooo, I decided to push myself out the door, because guilt hit me for doing nothing and Lars also went out to explore new motorcycle grounds. Stupid indirect peer pressure.
This morning I just woke up feeling extremely blessed.
I’ve been on this spiritual path for some years now and today has been one of those occurring existential crisis days. Those days where you just stare into the abyss for an unhealthy amount of time and you have no idea why you’re even on this forsaken planet.
In my last post I wrote about meeting my dark inner self again, because lately I’ve still had some triggers that lead me to minor anxiety attacks and fluctuations from a negative mind to a positive mind. I now understand that the triggers I get, are the small signs to things I need to put my attention towards and work on. In other words, another exciting weekend of digging, crying and developing!
Been off the grid from the blog for awhile (embracing my true self and stuff) and now I’m going off the grid in general for a weekend. To focus more on my blog as an extension of myself. So, I’m back – my authentic self.